30 August 2011

Thinking Paper #75: Free Schools - A Millionaire’s Bargain

By Roger Daring


Far from being free, Free Schools actually cost a lot of money. The sooner we realise this, and come to terms with it, the more we will understand what a free school actually is.

Free Schools - A Millionaire’s Bargain

The current freeness of free schools has finally emerged at a very reasonable £130m. The Secretary of State for Education, Michael Gove, a self professed fat-lipped quibbler, added a statement to these revelations saying “we wanted to spend lots of money to create the freest schools known to man without delay.”

The IIPBA applauds the Conservative Government and Friends in having created the most expensive free thing ever to have existed. Indeed, when this news was released, looting once again raged across London as people realised that they too could make something expensive into something free.

  • We don’t believe that things can be truly free unless they are sufficiently expensive.
  • We commend and wholeheartedly agree with Michael Gove’s concession that he is a fat-lipped quibbler, and hope that he will make more concessions of this nature in the future.
  • The IIPBA agrees that through doublethink, nonsense and propaganda we will successfully reach the Post-Bureaucratic Age.

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