1 November 2011

Thinking Paper #181 – Sarky Softpocket

By Roger Daring


The IIPBA generally regards Sarkozy as a bit of a softpocket. Until recently, that is. Recently Sarko got some balls. In a streak of magnificent fabulousness, Sarkozy has come out and called David Cameron ‘Un grand Nobjock’.

Sarky Softpocket

Tensions had become increasingly strained as the Euro Crisis looked more and more like a big, tasty crisis and less and less like a small guff that had floated out of Merkel’s undergarments.

The IIPBA was fortunate enough to see this leaked Sarkozy statement in full

“I am ‘ere today, to say ‘dis.

“Davide Camerohn, is a little poof, he is a little danceeng nobjock who knows nu’thing abouwt politiques or economiques. I guff in his chubby little nose, I shit on the belly of his mother, I stick my fin’gere in his podgy little ass‘hol!”

(This is exactly what he said, and no stereotypical tweaks have been added).

Although some may be shocked to hear such a statement from a French Prime Minister, the IIPBA is not in the least bit surprised. In fact, we led the drafting of this diplomatic masterpiece upon the request of the French Embassy.


Nicholas Softpocket Sarkozy – nous salute tu

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