5 December 2011

Thinking Paper #210 - Do we need Christmas presents? stuff?

By Tim Massingberd James

Abstract

The other day, the IIPBA's aunty got in touch asking what the IIPBA wants for Christmas. As it is, we wish we didn't have so much stuff anyway. Sometimes we wish an office fire would destroy the countless books, papers and pieces of nonsense we carry around with us. Yet tellybox tells us to go out and get more things. Where will it end?



Why do we all need so much stuff?

“Capitalism is Crisis” say the headbanging nutters on the steps of St Pauls. The IIPBA doesn't buy all that stuff about the bankers bonuses, but as far as we can tell there are some fundamendal problems with constantly buying more and more stuff. Land Rover are apparently to stop making Land Rovers because they last too long, and no one throws them away to buy another one a few years down the line. It's all nonsense.

The IIPBA done a research and found that apart from sunshine, the company of others, and the occasional pint of ale beside a warm fire, the great British public don't actually want anything any more.

However, everyone is afraid to mention it in case the Chinese come over and steal our wives. We don't necessarily need new stuff every week to make us happy, but we're so afraid of change the news keeps showing us the graphs and the numbers and telling us to buy.

Conclusion

We don't need the stuff. Everything will be alright from here on in. You will never die in a ditch filled with piss with flies in your eyes. Everything will be alright.

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